Good evening from the edge of the world. Well, not really, but it feels that way...
Have you ever been sailing on the smooth ocean of life? Suddenly, a breeze rises, then becomes a full gale. You find the boat taking on water, but the lifeboat is missing. You can see an island in the distance, but you're pretty sure that you don't have the energy left to swim.
Things have not changed much in the past three years. But after my vacation, it became increasingly difficult to cope with the day to day sadness. Not that I was looking at alternatives, but I became very withdrawn. Every move was like walking through jello. Each day was a repeat of the last. I began to live on sugar and carbs which did absolutely nothing to improve my attitude. I was sailing towards the edge of the world at full speed. I still did the things that were necessary, but I knew that a crash was inevitable. I would look in the mirror and not see ME. I would sleep through the weekend, getting up only to care for my Dad and eat more sugar. Not a very healthy lifestyle. LOL
I still worked, still did my projects, but didn't find much joy in either.
I'm not sure what changed, but after about a month, I finally jumped in and started swimming towards the island. Am I still tired? Absolutely. Am I still sad? Of course. But at least I'm heading back towards my life.
I finished the last bag of M&Ms and did not buy another. I crept back onto the treadmill. I pulled out my crocheted blanket and finished the last 10 rows.
So, I am here. Thank you so much to those who checked on me. It meant alot.
I am okay. A little worse for wear, but I'm collecting supplies and ready to sail home.
I have pictures of a few projects, but I will save them for my next post. Be kind to one another.