Sunday, February 9, 2014

Been a long couple of weeks. First, some creative stuff. Finished stitching this Valentine's freebie late, late last night. I should know better than to take a 7 pm nap. I think I finally headed towards bed at midnight. Silly me. I think I'll be making this into a little pillow or door hanger. I haven't decided which, but will be using the fabric that it is laying on.
Now to the "trying to get by" stuff. It has been difficult this past week. I had a visit from my dad's social worker. She has gently reminded me several times that I need to make "final" plans. Read into that...I need to take a trip to the funeral home to plan my dad's last wishes. Dad and I had talked about this about 10 years ago. First, he didn't want to be cremated. Then, he said to just dump him out in the field like we do with the dead cows. Lastly, he didn't care. Reminder to all: tell your family what you want done and stick to the plan. I want to be cremated and have told my family this many, many times. Why pay $5000 for a wooden or plastic box that you will plant in the ground? Don't see the point. But my mind wanders....More from Dad: he always said to get him flowers when he was alive, don't bother when he is dead. For many Father's Days, my son and I would plant bulbs in planters for my dad. He would always transfer them to the ground around his trailer. When he moved in with my husband and I, we dug up them up and brought them with us. I will eventually plant them at my house, but for now, the bulbs rest in big flower pots. They are doing well and I expect flowers any day now. So, I must make decisions on my own. Due to Dad's dementia, we aren't able to discuss this anymore. I made the call to the funeral home to set an appointment. I was very calm, but still couldn't discuss this in front of my dad. I had to take the phone to the other end of the house. I am such a big baby....I know it has to be done, but still feel like a traitor to talk about it in front of my dad. I will get it done, but not without tears and sorrow. Be kind to one another.

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