Do I Have A Secret?

Good morning, peeps.

Here it is Saturday. I am up early. Surprise, surprise, though I did get an hour of sleep in between 5:00 and 6:00. If you are looking for stitching or quilting pictures, nope, none available. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. LOL I have it all worked out in my head. I will get everyone fed, get a bit of exercise, and then do some stitching before bed. I am so funny. As if! I think I managed to stay awake until 8 pm last night. Of course, I had to get back up at 9 to do some Dad and husband chores, but I will count that as an hour of sleep. Back up at 4 am. Yep, the party animal really comes out at that time.

So, do I have a secret? Kinda. I am on the weekly visit list from Gloria, our social worker. Last week, she seriously suggested that I see my doctor. Hmmm, nope, that didn't happen. LOL So at this week's visit, I put on my happy face. Talked about DH's surgery, the fact that I am getting a bit of exercise, and don't I look better? She agreed. We discussed that sometimes, you can't make plans for the day. Sometimes you have to take it hour by hour. I agreed. Nodded my head at the appropriate times. I did not make one mention of the fact that I am waking up once in a while at night with the feeling that I cannot breathe. Oh no, that's not coming out! I do not have time for a breakdown. She smiled, said yes, I am doing better, and she will be back next Friday. Damn. Guess she didn't fall for it.

Is this a good secret? Not really. Sooner or later I will have to deal with me. I just don't have time right now. Dad and husband, plus working full time, takes almost every waking moment. We are still "kid" sitting, but I have been pretty clear with husband that the goats need to go. They are cute, I like them, but I just don't have the time and energy to deal with one more thing. He won't be able to use his arm and shoulder for up to four weeks. I can't do this by myself for that long.

Off to start another day. I've already did Dad and husband chores, fed the goats, had some very healthy oatmeal, and finished my first cup of creamer with coffee. LOL I will get a walk today, yes I will. And if I work it right, get taxes ready and do some stitching! I am ever hopeful...

Be kind to one another.